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Thursday, March 1, 2012
Friday, October 8, 2010
THE EXPENDABLES (2010) REVIEW
The Expendables is total ’80s cheese, with all the blood and gore audiences of the ’90s demand from their hard R-rated actioners. However, I would still say this is toned down from Sylvester Stallone’s 2008 throat-ripping return to Rambo. Taking that into consideration I can admit I had some fun with this film, but the idea of bringing a large group of action stars together doesn’t really pay off as much as you may think it would.
Despite the large list of names, Sylvester Stallone and Jason Statham are pretty much the stars of the show, though Jet Li’s name is included in the opening credits as the other top-line star. The rest of the crew all gets second-billing and the film treats them as such. As for the trailers selling Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bruce Willis as part of the cast, they get their five minute scene, but that’s it.
The story centers on a group of goofy-named mercenaries for hire made up of their leader Barney Ross (Stallone), knife specialist Lee Christmas (Statham), martial arts expert Ying Yang (Li), demolitions expert Toll Road (UFC fighter Randy Couture) and weapons specialist Hale Caesar (Terry Crews). This group has been hired to infiltrate the not-so-real South American island of Vilena where they are expected to overthrow General Gaza (David Zayas) who’s ruling the island like a dictator after entering into a deal with James Monroe (Eric Roberts), a dirty ex-CIA agent interested in starting up a little drug trade of his own and using the people of Vilena as slave labor.
Those curious about the cast members I’ve left out, but you’ve seen featured in the marketing, don’t worry I have you covered. One time pro wrestler “Stone Cold” Steve Austin plays one of Monroe’s henchmen, Mickey Rourke is a tattoo artist that once ran with Barney and the gang and Dolph Lundgren’s Gunner character is a bit of a story all his own that I won’t spoil for you here.As for the movie, if you’re looking for anything more than a bunch of explosions and bloodshed then you’ve come to the wrong place. Of course, if you are interested in this movie I have a hard time believing you are actually looking for anything else. You can trust me on this aspect, you get what you’ve come for, but I can’t say it’s so good it’s going to blow you away. However, the opening moments do offer a torso removal that sets the bar so high the extreme violence throughout can’t top it.
Stallone directed the film from a script he co-wrote with Doom co-writer Dave Callaham, which should give you a clear indication of what to expect in that department. For the most part it’s a “men on a mission” story, but with the involvement of so many men it’s hard to get a bead on any one of them outside of the paper thin background Rourke’s character offers on Barney and the relationship woes Christmas is involved in with Charisma Carpenter. And although I like the small bit of comedy Li adds to the film, Stallone doesn’t do much to show off his talents as Statham gets most of the glory in terms of the hand-to-hand fight scenes.
For what it’s worth, The Expendables is a fun hard-R actioner, but fun in the sense you know what you’re paying for and aren’t expecting much else. No new ground is broken here, but you will see gunfire, explosions and a large amount of chaos. I will say this for Stallone, his average is at the very least above the average of most others in this game.
Theaters: August 13, 2010
Directed by: Sylvester Stallone
Starring: Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Jet Li, Dolph Lundgren, Mickey Rourke, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Eric Roberts, 50 Cent, Charisma Carpenter, Giselle Itie, Terry Crews, Brittany Murphy, David Zayas
Distributed by: Lionsgate Films
Genres: Action,Adventure
Running Time: 103 minutes
Produced by: Avi Lerner,John Thompson,Robert Earl,Kevin King Templeton
Screenwriter: Sylvester Stallone
Executive Producers: Boaz Davidson,Trevor Short,Danny Dimbort
Despite the large list of names, Sylvester Stallone and Jason Statham are pretty much the stars of the show, though Jet Li’s name is included in the opening credits as the other top-line star. The rest of the crew all gets second-billing and the film treats them as such. As for the trailers selling Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bruce Willis as part of the cast, they get their five minute scene, but that’s it.
The story centers on a group of goofy-named mercenaries for hire made up of their leader Barney Ross (Stallone), knife specialist Lee Christmas (Statham), martial arts expert Ying Yang (Li), demolitions expert Toll Road (UFC fighter Randy Couture) and weapons specialist Hale Caesar (Terry Crews). This group has been hired to infiltrate the not-so-real South American island of Vilena where they are expected to overthrow General Gaza (David Zayas) who’s ruling the island like a dictator after entering into a deal with James Monroe (Eric Roberts), a dirty ex-CIA agent interested in starting up a little drug trade of his own and using the people of Vilena as slave labor.
Those curious about the cast members I’ve left out, but you’ve seen featured in the marketing, don’t worry I have you covered. One time pro wrestler “Stone Cold” Steve Austin plays one of Monroe’s henchmen, Mickey Rourke is a tattoo artist that once ran with Barney and the gang and Dolph Lundgren’s Gunner character is a bit of a story all his own that I won’t spoil for you here.As for the movie, if you’re looking for anything more than a bunch of explosions and bloodshed then you’ve come to the wrong place. Of course, if you are interested in this movie I have a hard time believing you are actually looking for anything else. You can trust me on this aspect, you get what you’ve come for, but I can’t say it’s so good it’s going to blow you away. However, the opening moments do offer a torso removal that sets the bar so high the extreme violence throughout can’t top it.
Stallone directed the film from a script he co-wrote with Doom co-writer Dave Callaham, which should give you a clear indication of what to expect in that department. For the most part it’s a “men on a mission” story, but with the involvement of so many men it’s hard to get a bead on any one of them outside of the paper thin background Rourke’s character offers on Barney and the relationship woes Christmas is involved in with Charisma Carpenter. And although I like the small bit of comedy Li adds to the film, Stallone doesn’t do much to show off his talents as Statham gets most of the glory in terms of the hand-to-hand fight scenes.
For what it’s worth, The Expendables is a fun hard-R actioner, but fun in the sense you know what you’re paying for and aren’t expecting much else. No new ground is broken here, but you will see gunfire, explosions and a large amount of chaos. I will say this for Stallone, his average is at the very least above the average of most others in this game.
Theaters: August 13, 2010
Directed by: Sylvester Stallone
Starring: Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Jet Li, Dolph Lundgren, Mickey Rourke, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Eric Roberts, 50 Cent, Charisma Carpenter, Giselle Itie, Terry Crews, Brittany Murphy, David Zayas
Distributed by: Lionsgate Films
Genres: Action,Adventure
Running Time: 103 minutes
Produced by: Avi Lerner,John Thompson,Robert Earl,Kevin King Templeton
Screenwriter: Sylvester Stallone
Executive Producers: Boaz Davidson,Trevor Short,Danny Dimbort
RESIDENT EVIL – AFTERLIFE 3D (2010) REVIEW
Which brings us to Resident Evil: Afterlife, the first video game adaptation filmed with the 3D technology used in James Cameron’s Avatar. In many ways, it’s strikingly modern. Falling three dimensional droplets of water perfectly bookend a few fight scenes, 300-like slow motion nicely stutters breakneck action sequences allowing the viewer full appreciation of Alice’s samurai quickness, and hideous, CGI-ed beasts accentuate the fantastical, undead video game elements so many players fell in love with. But for all its twenty-first century camera tricks and eye-popping visual aids, Resident Evil: Afterlife doesn’t seem to comprehend that it’s not 1985. Story arcs can no longer exist merely to structure the action. We need real characters, we need real motivations and for God’s sake, we need a reason to give a shit.
Alice (Milla Jovovich) is a genetic anomaly, living in a wasteland populated almost entirely by zombies. The nefarious Umbrella Corporation, led by Albert Wesker (Shawn Roberts), has been hunting her for years in an effort to harness her DNA, but all their vile aims, thus far, have failed abysmally. In return, Alice has devoted her life to finding other survivors and when the fancy strikes her, turning the umbrella inside out. Periodically, she’s joined on her quest by fellow human Claire Redfield (Ali Larter), but tragically, since we saw her last, she’s developed amnesia. This slight mental disability, thankfully, only proves a minor hiccup, and soon the pair commandeers a plane and hits up an old prison in an attempt to save a few fellow lost souls.
In a wild stroke of luck, one of those fellow lost souls turns out to be an ass-kicking machine named Chris Redfield (Wentworth Miller), who, wait for it, happens to be Claire’s long-lost brother. Along with the other survivors, Alice and company hatch a plan to escape and find Arcadia, a supposedly bristling utopia where disease-free people carouse. The plane initially seems like the right way to escape, but as it won’t hold everyone, the gang must forage through the sewer system to find a boat. We all know good things never happen in the sewer.
The problem with Resident Evil: Afterlife is not the story arc, it’s how that arc is compromised again and again in ways eerily-reminiscent of old, hollow video games. Take one of the side characters, a perky girl who may as well not have a name. The only real fact we learn about her is that she was a champion swimmer. How bizarrely handy when they need someone to dive into the water. Don’t worry about her though. She won’t be around after her skill is no longer needed. Take Claire’s amnesia. Why does she have amnesia? Because she can’t just start out cooperating with her brother. Then who would be left to triumphantly join forces? Take the hooded-goliath like creature who shows up to knock the prison walls down. Why, unlike the other zombies, is he able to use weapons and conceivably, powers of reason? Does he work for the Umbrella Corporation? Is he acting on his own agency? That’s right, he must be a boss, which means we must be at the end of a level.
In a lot of ways, Resident Evil: Afterlife is a product of this exact moment. It’s excited about its graphics, hung up on the new 3D technology at its finger tips, but in even more ways, in all of the important ways, it’s an adaptation which will soon feel decades behind its time. Just as the Spider-Man trilogy seemed trivial and surface-level after The Dark Knight, Resident Evil: Afterlife will lose all value when the luster of its new, cutting-edge graphics fades. Every day, new games like God Of War and Uncharted are being released that use violence to further the story arc. The novelty of cartoonish killing without well-developed backstory is over, soon the third dimension for third dimension’s sake will seem idiotic and outdated. What will that leave Resident Evil with? A few zombie fights in a sewer. We all know good things never happen in the sewer. Unless, of course, they involve
Theaters: September 10, 2010
Directed by: Paul W.S. Anderson
Starring: Milla Jovovich,Johnny Messner,Boris Kodjoe,Wentworth Miller,Ali Larter,Kim Coates
Distributed by: Sony Pictures
Genres: Action,Adventure,Sequel,Fantasy,Sci-Fi,Shot-In-3D
Running Time: 90 minutes
Produced by: Jeremy Bolt,Bernd Eichinger,Robert Kulzer,Samuel Hadida,Don Carmody
Screenwriter: Paul W.S. Anderson
Alice (Milla Jovovich) is a genetic anomaly, living in a wasteland populated almost entirely by zombies. The nefarious Umbrella Corporation, led by Albert Wesker (Shawn Roberts), has been hunting her for years in an effort to harness her DNA, but all their vile aims, thus far, have failed abysmally. In return, Alice has devoted her life to finding other survivors and when the fancy strikes her, turning the umbrella inside out. Periodically, she’s joined on her quest by fellow human Claire Redfield (Ali Larter), but tragically, since we saw her last, she’s developed amnesia. This slight mental disability, thankfully, only proves a minor hiccup, and soon the pair commandeers a plane and hits up an old prison in an attempt to save a few fellow lost souls.
In a wild stroke of luck, one of those fellow lost souls turns out to be an ass-kicking machine named Chris Redfield (Wentworth Miller), who, wait for it, happens to be Claire’s long-lost brother. Along with the other survivors, Alice and company hatch a plan to escape and find Arcadia, a supposedly bristling utopia where disease-free people carouse. The plane initially seems like the right way to escape, but as it won’t hold everyone, the gang must forage through the sewer system to find a boat. We all know good things never happen in the sewer.
The problem with Resident Evil: Afterlife is not the story arc, it’s how that arc is compromised again and again in ways eerily-reminiscent of old, hollow video games. Take one of the side characters, a perky girl who may as well not have a name. The only real fact we learn about her is that she was a champion swimmer. How bizarrely handy when they need someone to dive into the water. Don’t worry about her though. She won’t be around after her skill is no longer needed. Take Claire’s amnesia. Why does she have amnesia? Because she can’t just start out cooperating with her brother. Then who would be left to triumphantly join forces? Take the hooded-goliath like creature who shows up to knock the prison walls down. Why, unlike the other zombies, is he able to use weapons and conceivably, powers of reason? Does he work for the Umbrella Corporation? Is he acting on his own agency? That’s right, he must be a boss, which means we must be at the end of a level.
In a lot of ways, Resident Evil: Afterlife is a product of this exact moment. It’s excited about its graphics, hung up on the new 3D technology at its finger tips, but in even more ways, in all of the important ways, it’s an adaptation which will soon feel decades behind its time. Just as the Spider-Man trilogy seemed trivial and surface-level after The Dark Knight, Resident Evil: Afterlife will lose all value when the luster of its new, cutting-edge graphics fades. Every day, new games like God Of War and Uncharted are being released that use violence to further the story arc. The novelty of cartoonish killing without well-developed backstory is over, soon the third dimension for third dimension’s sake will seem idiotic and outdated. What will that leave Resident Evil with? A few zombie fights in a sewer. We all know good things never happen in the sewer. Unless, of course, they involve
Theaters: September 10, 2010
Directed by: Paul W.S. Anderson
Starring: Milla Jovovich,Johnny Messner,Boris Kodjoe,Wentworth Miller,Ali Larter,Kim Coates
Distributed by: Sony Pictures
Genres: Action,Adventure,Sequel,Fantasy,Sci-Fi,Shot-In-3D
Running Time: 90 minutes
Produced by: Jeremy Bolt,Bernd Eichinger,Robert Kulzer,Samuel Hadida,Don Carmody
Screenwriter: Paul W.S. Anderson
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